Maryland to Begin Taxing Halloween Treats

October 23, 2015 | By | 1 Reply More

This year, Halloween will not only be bad for Marylanders’ teeth, but for their wallets, as well. Earlier this week, the Maryland Department of Assessments and Taxation announced that the state tax of 6% will be levied on the candy that children collect while trick-or-treating in the state on Halloween.

A New Spin On an Old Tax

“This is not a new tax, per se,” said Max Proffets, spokesperson for the department. “Maryland has a Gift Tax on the books already that is used from time to time to prevent taxpayers from using gifts as a scheme to avoid other taxes. Although rarely used before now, the law could designate Halloween candy as a gift, which makes it taxable. We know that may be an unpopular interpretation, but we’re just doing our jobs.”

Mr. Proffets went on to say that, with the average pound of candy worth approximately six dollars, the tax would be set at $0.36 per pound. The average child nets 4.5 lbs. of candy during Halloween trick or treating, meaning that the net total revenue for the state would be $1.62 per child. This adds up to millions of dollars annually in previously unrealized revenues.

Not everyone was thrilled with the new candy tax, however. Sheila Stallings of Columbia, Maryland was surprised and shocked to learn that she would have to write a check to the state this year after her three children came home from trick or treating.

Halloween Candy

In the next session, Maryland legislators will determine if peanut butter Halloween candy will be taxed at a higher rate.

“It’s absolutely un-American,” Ms. Stallings said in disbelief. “It’s not like we live in Iceland, or Bolivia, or any other communist countries like that! My children have Constitutional rights to Halloween candy! It’s in the Bill of Rights, plus the Supreme Court said so. This is just Catholic-bashing, plain and simple.”

Governor Hogan Lends his Support

Governor Hogan had no official comment when contacted, but according to Brent Wadsworth, one of his senior aides, the Governor was in support of the tax.

“It’s not an ideal situation, and the Governor would not be in favor of it under normal circumstances,” said Wadsworth. “However, Governor Hogan has scaled back several taxes and fees since he first came into office and that has benefited millions of Marylanders. Unfortunately, that has also limited the tax revenues that we need to pay for things like the new mass transit system for Baltimore. Bus routes and buses don’t finance themselves, as we all know.”

According to the Maryland Department of Assessments and Taxation Website, this year’s tax on Halloween candy will be based on the national average of trick or treat candy collected, which would amount to $1.62 per child. On November 1st, weighing stations will be set up throughout the state at locations yet to be determined. Parents will be required to bring their child’s candy to these stations to be weighed and have the taxes assessed, and to pay the amount on-the-spot.

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Category: State of Maryland

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Staff writer. What the hell does that mean? Oh yeah, that's right. I do all the fucking grunt work while Linda, Wanda and Mark take all the credit. Hey, but you know what, that's OK. The checks always clear the bank. But come the day that they don't...let me just say four words.... Mark.Naked.Farm.Animals

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  1. Dan says:

    My kids are already familiar with the “Daddy Tax” so this shouldn’t be a problem.

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